As I wrote before in 12-step program, I’m going to try to change my lifestyle to become more healthy and fit. While weight loss will inevitably ensue, it is not the focus of this change. I’ve yo-yo’d between a high and low of 30 pounds in the last four years, and it’s starting to wear me down. Half the days of the week I walk around in general malaise. Time to change.

Every step will take a month, because some smart person ran some smart study that found it takes about 20 days to establish a new habit. I’m going to attempt one habit at a time. Nice and slow.

The month of January is step 1: Detox. By “detox”, I really mean “stop eating pure shit”. With the exception of carbonated drinks (don’t worry, that’s a later step), I’m going to try to stay away from food that was prepared or treated with chemicals; I’m going to only eat food that I either prepare myself, or that I can watch being prepared (ie. a sandwich). I know this may paint me as some sort of organic “whole foods” vegan nutcase, but it’s not that at all; I’m still going to eat burgers and the like but this time I’m going to make them myself out of raw ingredients so that I can maximize my food-to-chemicals ratio. No more chips, candy bars, or cookies; no more frozen meals or appetizers (which I sometimes inhale as meals). This also means most fast food is out, which means I must bid adieu to my good friends McDonald’s and Taco Bell. We’ve had good times, but I’m afraid the love is gone. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Lack of snacks are going to be tough, but luckily I have my old popcorn tricks to tide me over. And pop, for now.