(Edit 2025: I have been informed that “letterboxd” is a better outlet for this sort of thing, so I joined letterboxd and will put future reviews there.

I use every October as an excuse to binge horror movies. I’ve tried reviewing them at length on this blog in the past, but that turned out to be a colossal waste of time (I spent at least 15 minutes writing each review, about 4 hours total, and each post got single-digit views). But I still feel sharing the experience is useful in some way, so I’ll write the full list up with a small snippet of whether or not I recommend it and why.

I decided to try something different this year: Sort all of the unwatched horror movies I have on my local media server from WORST to BEST, according to audience rating. The idea was that, as I move from movie to movie, they would keep getting better and better :-D I have to say, the experiment worked! They started out utterly ridiculous, and slowly got better and better, with the occasional surprise (very bad, or very good) along the way. A few times, I couldn’t take it any more and watched a much better movie instead of following the rules I had set up for myself, but for the most part I stuck to the experiment and was pleased by it.

Here’s the list, in watched order:

1. The Phantom Eye (1999): Roger Corman cheese. Recommended.
2. The Prophecy (1995): Angels fighting angels. Christopher Walken as an angel! Recommended.
3. Dracula (1931): A classic. First half much better than second half. Recommended.
4. The Prophecy II (1998): A sequel, worth seeing for more Walken. Barely recommended.
5. The Prophecy 3: The Ascent (2000): Weak and not enough Walken. Skip.
6. The Prophecy: Uprising (2005): Low budget side-quel. Hallmark of low budgets is way too much dialog and not enough action or locations. Skip.
7. The Prophecy: Forsaken (2005): Sequel to low budget side-quel. Forgettable. Skip.
8. The Clonus Horror (1979): First half better than second half but worth sticking it out. Recommended.
9. The Hand (1981): This was WAY better than the ratings suggested. Michael Caine’s severed hand starts murdering people who anger him. Highly recommended.
10. Devil Doll (1964): Twilight zone did this way better (twice). Skip.
11. New Terminal Hotel (2010): The return of Stephen Geoffreys to mainstream acting. He’s good, everyone else is not. Skip.
12. Halloween III: Season of the Witch (1982): Can’t believe I hadn’t seen this before 2024! This is totally not a Halloween movie, and it’s super bananas at times, but I was never bored. Commentary track with Tom Atkins is just as entertaining as the film. Highly recommended.
13. Uncle Sam (1996): Desert Storm zombie comes back as Uncle Sam to wreak patriotism on a small town. Recommended (barely).
14. How to Make a Monster (2001): Computer program comes to life and kills people. Obligatory Julie Strain appearance. Computer-speak is difficult to cringe through, but there were some cute and clever moments. Recommended if you like “OMG computers world wide web first person shooter” cheese from the early 2000s.
15. Contamination (1980): Italian rip-off of Alien that was so terrible I was yelling at the screen. Avoid at all costs.
16. He Knows You’re Alone (1980): Serial killer hunts down brides-to-be. Tom Hanks’ first movie where he has no impact on the story at all. Forgettable.
17. Frankenstein (1931): A classic. Worth seeing.
18. The Initiation (1984): Daphne Zuniga’s first film. One of two horror films I watched this month set in a mall. Skip.
19. The Video Dead (1987): An offbeat zombie horror film. One of two horror films I watched this month where zombies invade our world through a television. It’s not really worth seeing, despite two funny uses of an iron.
20. Frankenstein Unbound (1990): Roger Corman’s reimagining of Frankenstein. Fantastic cast, surprisingly good props for the budget (a Corman tradition), but ultimately not worth seeing. It’s just not enjoyable to watch.
21. Hellbound (1994): Chuck Norris swears and kicks demon butt. Movie, however, does not kick butt. Skip.
22. The Puppet Masters (1994): The “28 weeks later” of Invasion of the Body Snatchers. Recommended.
23. Prom Night (1980): Rumor has it that Jamie Lee Curtis agreed to star, at a low salary, if she were permitted to dance. And disco dance she does. Not enough to save the film though. Skip.
24. Strange Invaders (1983): A nearly perfect homage to 1950’s communist-scare alien movies. If you haven’t seen any 1950’s sci-fi then you won’t be in on the joke and probably won’t like it. Recommended (barely).
25. The Boogey Man (1980): Ineptly handled horror slasher. Skip.
26. The Final Destination (2009): Not as good as the first Final Destination film, but still very enjoyable and has fun with the kills. Recommended.
27. The Wolf Man (1941): Another classic, and worth seeing — but there’s a lot of 1940s-isms that don’t resonate very well today, like discrimination and sexism. Lon Chaney Jr. is better in makeup than not. Tough to recommend.
28. Christmas Evil (1980): A fascinating film that is more drama, exploitation, and thriller than horror. A statement against apathy and commercialism. Recommended, but only barely.
29. Evilspeak (1981): Clint Howard conjures up the demon form of Richard Moll using an Apple II computer! It’s a terrible film, but come on, conjuring demons with an Apple II. Reluctantly recommended.
30. Mutant (1984): Inept zombie movie with inept shambling zombies that are created by inept chemicals from an inept evil company. Did I mention it was inept? Skip (unless you like seeing Wings Hauser ad-lib half his lines)
31. Friday the 13th: The New Blood (1988): Jason against a girl with telekinesis. Does not live up to the promise of Jason-against-telekinesis, unfortunately. Skip.
32. Mimic (1997): Guillermo del Toro’s worst film is still worth watching. Director’s Cut is supposed to be better than the theatrical cut I watched. Recommended.
33. ABCs of Death 2 (2014): I loved this! 26 different short vingettes from 26 different directors. Recommended.
34. Ben (1972): A lonely boy befriends a smart leader rat of a smart rat swarm. Sequel to Willard. Super slow with no real payoffs. Hated them both. Skip.
35. Chopping Mall (1986): Robots kill teens hiding in a mall after dark. Second of two horror films I watched this month set in a mall. Unlike the other one, this one is very silly, but it knows it and has a ton of fun with the premise. Recommended.
36. Demons 2 (1986): Italian film that tries to rip off so many movies simultaneously I lost count of how many. Second of two horror films I watched this month where zombies invade our world through a television. Dreadful film that even the good makeup/prosthetics can’t rescue. Skip.
37. The Children (1980): Deadly children! Low budget but manages to stay interesting throughout. Recommended.
38. A Cold Night’s Death (1973): Two-person movie where Robert Culp and Eli Wallach try to figure out what killed everybody at a remote arctic research station. Originally a made-for-TV movie, rises above that and was one of the hidden gems of this month’s horror movie experience. Highly recommended.
39. Mom and Dad (2017): Mass hysteria causes parents to murder their children. Nicolas Cage and Selma Blair do their best with the material, but the movie loses confidence in its own premise. Can’t really recommend it.
40. Return of the Living Dead III (1993): One of my favorite cult classics — I have seen this many times before but try to watch it once a decade anyway. Has a few unique and cynical twists on the living dead zombie premise. If you liked the first RotLD from 1985, you’ll like this one. (Skip the second RotLD.)
41. The Night Flier (1997): Miguel Ferrer investigates a serial killer who travels by plane. Takes a while to get going but ultimately worth it. Recommended.
42. Popcorn (1991): Horror comedy mystery. Resisting urge to call it cheesy. “Black Comedy For Dummies”. Barely recommended.
43. Dead Hooker in a Trunk (2009): Student project made for $2500. Great student project, disappointing movie. Skip.
44. The Eye (2008): I see dead people, but not as good as Sixth Sense. What could have been a good premise is wasted on Jessica Alba’s limited acting ability. Skip.
45. Poltergeist (1982): The last time I saw this was in August 1982, when my brother and I snuck into the theater to watch it after having watched Tron. Came across the 4k version and decided to revisit it. Fantastic movie where many aspects of it still hold up. Highly recommended.
46. House of Wax (2005): Starts slow but methodically gets better and better as the movie goes along. Paris Hilton, surprisingly, can actually act. Some very unexpected practical effects. Recommended.
47. Sixteen Tongues (1999): Cinema verité shot on analog video DV cams. True cyberpunk, which is dystopian and depressing. Extremely low budget (the “future” is littered with 16-bit ISA cards and classic Macs), takes place in a single location. Script is so good that it exceeds the acting capability of the actors, sadly. Not Rated (which means practically X-rated). I’m glad I watched it, as I’m a fan of performance art, but I can’t really recommend it as it will disgust most people.
48. The Keep (1983): Michael Mann’s only non-crime-thriller movie. Was clearly a much longer film with better narrative pacing before it was cut in half by producers. Cool practical effects. Recommended.
49. Hell Night (1981): College hazing takes a wrong turn after locking people in a house that is already inhabited by a psycho. Takes forever to get going and almost never gets there. Skip.
50. The Sentinel (1977): A woman has psychic flashbacks after moving into a strange apartment complex. Despite many recognizable stars, has a weak payoff. Used people with actual physical deformities as scary people, which is not really acceptable today. Skip.
51. The Thing (2011): This is the prequel to The Thing (1982), which itself is a remake of The Thing From Another World (1951). All of them are recommended and each bring something to the table, but Carpenter’s The Thing (1982) is clearly the best and should be watched BEFORE watching this prequel, as the prequel will permanently spoil the 1982 film. Recommended.

51 movies — a new record for me. There are still days left in October, but I think I’ll stop there.

Hope this helped someone!